


in the waiting

by dawnstruck



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: EWE, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Mild Angst, Season 8 Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-19 14:23:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17003328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dawnstruck/pseuds/dawnstruck
Summary: Keith and Shiro, they very nearly had something.





	in the waiting

**Author's Note:**

> Though I had fortunately already emotionally detached from myself from VLD as the past seasons had already been overall disappointing in many ways, I did not expect the writers to fuck up quite so spectacularly. I was already torn over whether I should bother watching S8 at all, but when I saw the spoilers, I knew that I need not bother. Still, I am upset about how these characters I was so fond of were mistreated.  
> I started talking to a friend about how Shiro and Keith could possibly end up in this situation where all their previous development seemed to be meaningless. And, to be honest, I couldn't help but be reminded a little bit of Kirk and Spock at the beginning of TMP. However, while Space Husbands managed to overcome their difference in canon, this is my attempt of giving Space Boyfriends the chance to do the same.  
> I hope it worked.

* * *

 

_ My heart’s begging for mercy _

_ How much longer can I sit still and be _

_ Hopeful and doubting and torn inside _

[In the Waiting ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7NzNXTABMs)by Kina Grannis

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Keith and Shiro, they very nearly had something. They had that promise, that  _ later _ , and  _ when we are done _ .

Only, they are never truly done. There is the regrouping and reuniting and rebuilding. There are who knows how many people starving, planets thrown into disarray as the economy crumbled because of the war and then because the Galra Empire imploded in on itself.

Keith spoke of reaching out to surviving Galra soldiers who were willing to redeem themselves. He spoke of facilitating collaboration between the planets so that their various technologies might help everyone. He spoke with calm and with confidence. Not like a rebel or a hero, but like a true leader.

Shiro, while he listened, dreamed of sleeping in on the weekend, of shooing a dog off the sofa, of sitting on the porch and reading a book or drinking a beer. He dreamed of neighbors greeting him from across the street. He dreamed of peace. Not to be a creator of it, but a receptor.

 

 

 

Once upon a time, Shiro dreamed of greatness.

Then, within the blink of an eye, his dream had turned into a nightmare that never seemed to end.

 

 

 

Shiro does appreciate the irony of life that teaches him to understand how Adam must have felt.

Because, now, he is the one who cannot stand to watch a loved one go and risk his life, be away for months at a time. He is the one who has to be selfish to protect what is left of his heart. He is the one who walks away.

 

 

 

They never talk about it, not properly. One day, Keith looks at him like he hung the moon, and the next he doesn’t. Shiro accepts that it hurts but he doesn’t show it. He has forfeited that right.

 

 

 

Before Kerberos, Shiro wanted nothing but the stars. And, before Kerberos, during Kerberos, after Kerberos, Keith wanted Shiro.

Yet it’s Keith who has found a home among the stars now. A purpose and a family. He was born to them, and he was always meant to find his way back, even if he didn’t know it then.

Shiro, likewise, must return to simpler beginnings.

 

 

 

He still works for the Garrison. He isn’t fully equipped for civilian life and he knows it. Here, at least, people are used to the sight of him. He is a hero to them, yes, but he is also the idiot who dropped his tray in the mess the other day and spilled bean soup everywhere.

He feels useful here, as a consultant and correspondent. Somehow, by no design of his own, he never handles the talks with the Blades, only gets reports on what was discussed and who was there, even if not in person.

Keith’s name is there, quite regularly, and then less regularly, as though a flip had been switched one day. As though he felt he no longer had a reason to stick around. Shiro doesn’t let himself wonder why that is.

 

 

 

Curtis is a good man. He is witty and warm, a connoisseur of expensive wines and pretty atrocious action movies. He is a good lover who doesn’t linger too long on Shiro’s scars because he has a good idea where they came from.

He is like Shiro, in many ways, a soldier who wants something beyond the uniform, who wants to wake up next to someone and be glad for it, a house, a garden, a future together.

“Yes,” Shiro says, when Curtis asks him to marry him, during a walk on the beach when they are visiting Shiro’s hometown in Sendai.

_ Yes _ , because how many good men will Life throw his way?

He sends Keith an invitation to the wedding. He wars with himself over whether to do it or not, but not sending one seems like the worse offense. He wonders whether it will be difficult to face Keith on the day he says yes to another man. He wonders whether Curtis will notice the tension between them.

It turns out he shouldn’t have worried. Keith sends no reply. He does not show up at the wedding.

Matt is his best man, because why not. The others don’t even question it. They don’t ask where Keith is. Maybe they assume he must have an important mission. Maybe they know better than to rub salt into the wound.

“I do,” Shiro says, because he does.

_ I do _ , because there is no one in the crowd who has objections to this union.

 

 

 

Little over two years after the end, they finally manage to organize a reunion with just their core group. It makes Allura’s absence all the more glaring, but they all manage to smile through the hugs and greetings anyway.

They meet at Shiro’s place because it’s close to the Garrison without any of the military feel. Curtis left in advance to give them space, but he helped Shiro prepare the buffet that’s laid out on the kitchen island.

Shiro had kissed him goodbye, queasy with the knowledge of who would soon be stepping over the threshold of this home he had built.

Keith, when he shows up, looks good. His hair is long and bound in a low ponytail. His cheekbones are sharper, the look in his eyes more mellow. The burn scar on his cheek has faded to a dull pink.

“It’s great you could finally make it,” Pidge says, slapping his ass. “Lance is so boring when he has no one to antagonize.”

“Seriously, don’t the Blades know how to relax?” Hunk asks. “You’d think that, now that things are looking up, they’d give you more time for some Rest and Recreation.”

Keith lifts his shoulders in a shrug, looking unbothered.

“I could have more time off, if I wanted to,” he admits. “But it’s not like I have places to be.”

The only family he has, after all, is Krolia. Earth is little but an afterthought.

Above Pidge’s head, their eyes meet.

 

 

 

“You got a dog,” Keith notes when Shiro goes to show them the garden. Ahead of them, Lance is explaining something about Terran botany to Coran who listens with rapt attention.

“Yeah,” Shiro says, crouching down to run his good hand over Akira’s head, tangle his fingers in the shaggy brown fur. “We got him from the pound. He was abandoned as a puppy, found wandering around in a junkyard.”

Keith smiles, but there is something bitter about it. “Always rescuing strays, aren’t you?”

Shiro swallows, adjusts his glasses as he stands up again.

“How’s your mother?” he asks, hoping to change the subject.

“Busy.” Keith crosses his arms. “But things are wrapping up on Ikar, so they could spare me.”

“It’s good you’re here,” Shiro says, looking after Akira as he runs off again to chase a magpie. “We missed you.”

“Did you?” Keith asks. It’s a justified question because Shiro cannot recall the last time he truly thought about rekindling their friendship.

“You didn’t come to the wedding,” he says instead and immediately bites his tongue because he hadn’t meant to.

Keith sends him a look. It’s not spiteful, it’s not incredulous, just flat and direct, as though all the former depth between them had been siphoned away.

“I’m not a good actor,” he says, as though that explains everything.

Shiro licks his lips. “I would have liked for you to be there.”

To pardon him, to support him, to show Shiro that he could have his friendship if not his love.

Keith turns away. His arms are still crossed, but now they tighten around himself.

“I spent years waiting for you,” he says. His voice sounds choked up. “Between Kerberos and the mission failure, and your disappearance and when me and my mom were away. Four years, nearly five. And the whole time, my driving force was to see you again. To show you how much I had grown so that you could be proud of me. You told me to lead, so I led. And then I have to hear from James Griffin of all people that you started dating someone.”

Shiro opens his mouth. Closes it. He doesn’t know what to say.

“Let’s take a selfie!” Lance suddenly yells from across the yard, waving them over with swinging arms.

Keith immediately trots over, not bothering to look back, but the line of his back is rigid.

By the time they are all posing and Lance is angling the camera to get a good shot, Shiro has managed to compose his face.

“Well, that turned out nicely, I dare say,” Coran announces happily as he checks the result. Shiro glances over his shoulder to peer down at the display.

It looks right to see them like this, finally together again.

“Oh man,” Hunk says, turning away to wipe a tear from his eye. “Oh man, I told myself I wouldn’t cry.”

“Some things never change,” Pidge laughs, rubbing his back in a comforting manner.

_ No _ , Shiro agrees quietly, his eyes on the way the mild breeze tugs at Keith’s hair. His hand itches to reach out and touch his shoulder, feel the once familiar warmth.  _ They don’t. _

 

 

 

That night, when Curtis comes home, he sees the look on Shiro’s face and immediately knows that something is wrong.

“Did something happen?” he asks, a worried hitch in his voice as he crosses the room in three quick steps.

Shiro looks at him with his lips pursed to keep them from quivering.

“I want a divorce,” he says.

 

 

 

And then Shiro waits.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I do so love to retcon endings I don't like. *side-eyes the Naruto manga*
> 
> Can you believe that, back in March, I was planning an elaborate canon Sheith mpreg fic? Crazy how our dreams get destroyed, huh?
> 
> In any case, I am still grateful for the happy memories the show has given me. I wrote a lot of fic, became a better writer, gained a lot of readers who have followed me into other fandoms, so that at least is something to be grateful for. So while this may well be my last VLD fic, it is hopefully not the last of my writing that you guys might enjoy. ;)
> 
> Anyway, feel free to come rant to me on Tumblr (@dawnstruck) or Twitter (@struckbydawn) or leave your opinions in the comments - I think we all need to vent. ;)


End file.
